Friends - Bloggers and Real Life
I never took the time to think about the intersection of my friends in real life and my bloggy friends. I suppose I always thought never the two shall meet but unexpectedly I had to face this situation head-on. I was doing my usual, reading the most recent posts of my bloggy friends and there it was – like a light flashing Morse code on a fog- filled night. A request from a new bloggy friend, specifically, a request to become a facebook friend. Beckoning me. And being the person that I am, I took the request to be directed at me. No, my name was not mentioned it was a general request but I am a reader/new friend and of course I would comply with this simplest of all requests.
Or would I?
You see, although my face is plastered on my blog I have not mentioned my last name. You have a general indication of where I live but not an exact town. So although I am not an anonymous blogger, only those aspects of my life that I chose to reveal are posted for all to see.
Facebook is a whole ‘nother story.
Facebook is composed of my friends in real life. Some have known me since kindergarten, others middle school, high school, college, grad school, live in South Africa, live here - I think you get the picture. There are those that want to network – mostly individuals that I may or may not have met in college but want to connect. And a very tiny percentage – less than 2% ,are friends of friends that I added because well, they have good references. But never have I added a bloggy friend.
You may wonder what the big deal is. Well, I will tell you. As bloggy friends you actually know me quite well. You know the minutia of my daily existence, my triumphs and vulnerabilities. You my friends, know me. And of course since I have only been at this for (not quite) 2 months there is still mucho terrain to cover but you do know me.
Many of my friends in real life do not know me as intimately. You know the drill – we become adults and life happens. We check in on a monthly, yearly, five-year, ten-year time frame and life goes on. Not because we are not close but, you know, life happens.
So here is the dilemma. Do I let my bloggy friends know me totally and completely? Or do I just compartmentalize and keep my friends in their respective places. Because I don’t know about you but most of my friends in real life do not read my blog. They have been invited – on facebook as a matter of fact – but only a few have stopped in. Some let me know subtly others overtly and I am cool with that.
Am I cool with letting my bloggy friends into the real world?
I guess I am. But it will be on a case-by-case basis and of course I need references because really you never can be too safe nowadays (which directly contradicts my behavior in Paris – but I chalk that up to youth and naiveté). Whew!
I have a friend request in on facebook for my new bloggy friend. I wonder what will happen next? Nothing I am sure. I will be just another friend among a host of friends and all of my worry will have been for naught.
So I have a question for you - do you mix bloggy friends with your real world friends?